Good, Bad and the Ugly

Friday, September 16th, 2016

The Good: My father-in-law’s neighbor was not stretching the truth or being a lying used car salesman when he said this handicap walker was truly worth $275 brand new. The Dolomite Legacy 600 is sleek, remarkably comfortable and durable enough to take a hell of a beating. Also, five of the eight doors in my house are still intact and do not need replacing.

The Bad: The chance of hearing that old chestnut, “luckily we got to it in time” seems more and more unlikely after an entire season, a fourth of a year, passes without diagnosis. Today I had the worst dissociative episode in eight months and I tried to break everything. Everything, ever. That’s a thing that happens once in a while, but only since I’ve been born. I wasn’t really “there” at the time it went down today, but we think it might have started because it was a Friday and the dogs were barking? Or maybe the continued lack of diagnosis after three months of rapid and relentless decline. And I would have succeeded breaking all the things and ruining the rest of the doors if not for those meddling kids and if I were still able-bodied! Then I would never have fallen right over after throwing my Dolomite through the air. Wait, you think that’s a fucking joke?

The Ugly: “Today your autoimmune panel finally came back. It’s negative. I would encourage you to get a second opinion.”